Thursday, May 12, 2011


I've been working on a couple new ideas, including the location and introductory setting of a scene. Below I've included descriptive notes for a scene. Some of my followers from Twitter might think, where's the grammar? In this setting I'm sort of sidestepping the grammar, and instead using the unstructured sentences to add to the scene. I have written more to this scene but want to get your idea on this piece before I add the upcoming paragraphs.  My plan is to post scene 'clips' and see what you think, feel free to share your thoughts. Consider, "What is the scene?" "How does it make you feel? What might happen next?", or "What do you feel I have on my mind?"

Here goes!


Dripping water into darkness, and then more water. An echo of water dripping into what seems eternity and the echo of silence between the drips. Water moving without drips and without a cause. Coldness of air which does not drip but does move for no reason. Moving water but not touching water, washing the surface of non-water, water touching dirt. In turn water makes mud that slides against other mud and positions to meet water dripping…dripping to be combined but then considered separate. Cool mud, mud from a recent rain which drips, drips, drips.

Insects move across the top of the water, and surfaces chasing each other - gather and then scatter. Pooling over the moisture continues its movement, working with gravity, moving down toward the supporting surface. Mud, existing possibly for months or years, maybe centuries while waiting dormant for water, insects, and gravity continues its movement. Water runs down leaves as lightning cracks across the sky and thunder rumbles in the distance.  


  1. Don't change a thing, in my opinion. I'm a fan of poetic prose and stream of consciousness writing.

  2. Thanks Lisa for your encouraging comments, I've been thinking that setting the scene with a stream of thought might be effective in this case. I'm hoping for other comments to provide me a sense of measure in this case. Once again, thank you